There’s a lot going on in that little critter’s head right now.
1. Power move.
2. Why do people whisked away to magical worlds just automatically believe the first creature that tells them what side the person needs to help? Where’s my isekai where the MC slowly finds out they got in with like the deranged zealots and are part of the evil faction, and not the plucky rebels?
I think about this comic once per week. It’s funnier then anything I can conceive of. Mastery.
scientists in the 1990s, putting a Get More Purple gene attached to a harmless plant virus into an already purple petunia: please get more purple
the petunia, sensing an apparent honest to god Get More Purple Disease, using the previously undiscovered RNAi antiviral ability to shut down all other purple genes along with it just in case: you put VIRUS in petunia? you infect her with the More Purple?? oh! oh! her children shall bloom white! jail for mother, jail for mother for One Thousand Years!!!!
Noticed something a little funky in the world around you and want to figure out what’s up? Especially if there might be something you ought to be doing about it? Not sure what information sources to trust these days? If you’re in the US, federal agencies like NOAA, USGS, EPA and more collect massive amounts of scientific data every day, much of which is publicly available online - if you know where to look.
A PDF version with clickable links is available for free on my itchio page (quakeandquiver); I’ll add a direct link in a reblog.
I sent a letter today - something I haven’t done for years
It’s full of plastic bread clips
It’s for Science
At the risk of loosing some mystery, I think I should add some context:
There’s this website-I mean, scientific organization called the Holotypic Occlupanid Reasurch Group.
They are a group of abiologists who study and classify Bread clips.
I found a species that has not yet been described:
Yay for citizen science 👍
wtf?
Update:
Apparently HORG is widely appreciated by pediatricians since knowing exactly what kind of Occlupanid a child may have swallowed makes removing it safely much easier
IIRC this is actually part of the reason HORG was started. A man swallowed a breadclip and the clip closed around part of his tissue linings (in his intestines I think?). The specific shape and flexibility of the clip were significant determining factors in the removal process, as some bread clips have spikes and prongs that would have made extraction more complicated. They started the taxonomy so they could work out extraction techniques for each type.
are you fucking kidding me occlu like oculus or close and panid like bread. its a fancy word for breadcloser
Steven Universe ended on a great note, but now I just really want a spinoff series about Steven travelling across America and inflicting his own brand of weirdness on people
“So this guy walks into the diner. I say ‘guy’ because I had no idea how old he was, he was either a very tall child or a babyfaced grandpa. He’s wearing a bright pink varsity jacket and flip-flops, and when he’s done breakfast he gives me a fifty-dollar tip on a five dollar breakfast. So now I’m thinking, ‘Oh, I gotta know more about this guy,’ and I ask him what he does for work.
“And this guy looks at me, and he looks like the oldest man in the world, and he says, and I quote, ‘I used to run a school but I retired because the stress was killing me,’ and walks out. I think about him maybe once a week.”
“I really love being a creator sometimes. Last week I was at a local con, selling enamel pins and this teenager - I think he was a teen, but he looked like a giant toddler - comes over in his gaudy-as-heck pink jacket. Face is fresh as morning dew but he’s got a real tired look in his eyes, until he sees somehing out the corner of his eye that makes him light up. Like I swear you could see stars in his eyes. Things is, I used to be big into a silly show called Crying Breakfast Friends and still had some pins left in the grab box. Never sold a lot of them cause the show was old by now and those were some early pins I made so they were not the best, but he goes absolutely feral over them so I say he can have them for cheap. He’s about to pay when he sees my other pins and their prices and insists to pay full price. I’m taken aback and for some reason try to argue, but he says “Look, you are not my moms, you can’t survive on love and light alone”. I sorta didn’t process that, but was more focused on stopping that boy from overspending on some crappy pins cause he seemed real nice and then he just follows it up with “I get it. You don’t think they are as good as the other ones, but you put the same work into them as the others. They are an important part of how your art became yours and that’s why they are some of the most important pins you ever made”. This kid nearly made me choke up and I gave up argueing against getting more money.
So we start talking about CBF. It felt real good to talk about something that you thought only you cared about with someobdy else and we really got along. And the kid used to be a superfan, used to make reaction videos and fanart and roleplayed with his breakfast, even made breakfast OCs. The last thing he didn’t really want to talk about, because he got real quiet all of sudden. How can breakfast hurt you that bad? But I managed to cheer him up by saying I’m gonna make more CBF pins and would send him some. He was super grateful and told me to send it to the beach of his city. I wanted a real address but he said the postwoman there would know what it meant.
And just as he leaves he say “My therapist said I should reconnect with the things that make me happy to combat my PTSD and existential dread, so thanks, you really saved me here” boy you’re 16, ur welcome but what the hell?
UPDATE: I found his tubetube account and yeah, there’s all the reaction videos but also he apparently used to be part of SADIE KILLER AND THE SUSPECTS like he played a bit of guitar with them and documented their sessions and uploaded them AND HIS DAD WAS THE MANAGER THAT LAUNCHED THEM BECAUSE HE ASKED HIM TO DO IT wat? I have so many questions. Like did the rockstar life give him PTSD before they even got big? Does he have a dad and two moms? was his dad his mom? is this a trans thing? who is that sweet boy?
SECOND UPDATE: Apparently his dad is an underground rock legend and a millionaire cause his song appeared in a sprite commercial. I’m done. How are people real”
This is Thelockpickinglaywer and what I have for you today is something very interesting. As you can tell by the agonizing screams of the damned, I have recently left the mortal coil and, upon arriving at my destination, was informed that I did not qualify for residence. I was taken by an angel of the Lord to the mouth of Hell, and when the angel left, he closed this rather large red door and sealed it with a divine key. Although I’ve never seen this particular model of lock before, I’ve spent some time investigating the cylinder with this small shard of bone. By sticking it in the back of the keyway and slowly pulling it out, I can tell that this is a five-pin tumbler lock, that can easily be single-pin picked using this shed demon scale as a tensioner tool. Let’s try that right now. Alright, nothing on one. Nothing on two. Three is binding firmly, click out of that. Nothing on four. Five is binding, little click there, back to one. Once again, nothing. Two is binding, and we’ve dropped into a false set. Little click out of three. Nothing on four. Little click on one, counter-rotation on two, and we got this open. Okay folks, I think the main takeaway here is that no matter how much faith you place in a mechanism designed to ensure your safety, be it spiritual or physical, there is always a state in which it can fail. In any case, thank you for watching. Memento mori, and I’ll see you next time.
ALT
